Wow! Were do I begin? I couldn’t sit down last week and write about this. I am stronger this week and have thought long and hard about A.J. leaving. Last Tuesday A.J. had his Navy Recruiter come to our house at 6:00 p.m. to go over everything we would ever want to know about my son going into the Navy.
I am having a really hard time with this. I know as a mother that my children will not be with me forever. They will go away to school, get married but why the Navy. I had a very hard time when B.C. went away to the Navy. It is almost like your mother duties are over. They don't need you anymore! I am one that has to feel needed! B.C. still loves me and needs me as a mother, it is just different. I like doing things for people and the ones that I love. It is just a part of who I am. When B.C. went away to the Navy, he was in boot camp for 3 month, as will A.J. be. They write you, maybe one or two letters and that is all the contact you have with your child. You raise them for 18 years and then you get one or two letters and that is all. The hardest thing, I know what it will be like. This is really hard to think about.
We went over the advancement, schooling, money he will be receiving, where he could be stationed, him being deployed out on a ship for 6 months at a time. I know I have to let go, I tell you, it is very hard to let go of a person.
When I came home from work on Saturday morning my husband informed me that a different Navy Recruiter was coming over at 12:00 p.m. for us to fill out the paper work they need to get the ball rolling with A.J. Consent forms, Medical release forms, and o.k. for them to drive A.J. to and from Meds. It is almost like you are signing your child over to strangers.
To think that I will only have 3 children that I am responsible for is just amazing to me. I know that is still a big family to some people but I am a mother of 7.
I will live through all of this and be stronger (hopefully) when the next ones are ready to leave the nest.
I did have a long talk with A.J. after the Recruiter left. A.J. seemed so nervous when the Recruiter was here. He looked at me and said, "Mom I am going to be graduating High School and leaving my home. I'll be away from everyone and everything I know. Wouldn't you be nervous and upset if it were you?" All I can do is be available for A.J. right now. He is having as hard as time with this as his mother.
I think one of the hardest things in life for a mother is to have her children grow up and leave home.
ReplyDeleteSounds like he is a responsible young man in making plans for his future. You can be proud of that!
Dot,
ReplyDeleteI want to thank you for your friendship. I knew you would understand what I am going through. It feel like such a void when they leave home. You take care of them and then, nothing. You know, it's just very hard.
The wonderful thing about life is the different seasons we are in. I didn't know what I would do when I had an empty nest, but God had plans. I know how your heart hurts right now. I'll pray he will do well and be safe. And I'll pray that God will comfort you and give you a sense of peace about all this.
ReplyDeleteLinda,
ReplyDeleteI know it is just going to be a different stage in my life. I can from your comment that you have been through it and have lived. I will miss A.J. will all my heart.